Dog Days...
Let slip the dog days of war... September 30, 2026
I've always liked summer. If you asked me 10 years ago what my favourite season was, I'd say summer. It's spring, now, but summer is still the big thing, the thing i plan events around. But as i've gotten old...er, there's been this relentless feeling that im wasting them. it's not a careless season anymore, it's "how can i make this the greatest summer of my life?" i'll never be a teen again, i'll never be this again, i'll never be blah blah blah. I can't seem to shake the feeling that this will be my last happy careless summer, so i make it careful and even less careless. I know i'm wrong about the last summer thing, believe me i'm not that dumb i've seen enough coming of age mo- i have read enough polemics about them to know i'm wrong but still. I feel a bit like Holden in Catcher in the Rye (not in the evil way) as if i'm trying to stop myself from falling into the pit of adulthood, i'm my own catcher in the rye. I know i'll get over it, and as the days go by and i see the clouds above the moon, i'm nostalgic and cry listening to the song, but i'm happy. I know my future will hold a lot of fun things, maybe i'll be able to talk during my guitar lessons, and make friends at university.
In the Heat of October
you're so different from the rest...October 31, 2025
This month has been a strange one. Firstly, I have noticed a strange pattern. I always developing crushes in October, and they always ride bikes. And also that my seasonal depression will only hit when it stops becoming sunny, so global warming is my best friend. Oh, Happy Halloween by the way. I was a very underwhelming batman but give me some slack, this is my first halloween costume. I went thrift shopping today and this girl came up to me so unexpectedly to ask my opinion and i gave it, and we talked. But i felt so uncomfortable, and it's part of this growing realization for me. How much of my lack of want for friendshing is just from the fact that i can't make any friends? that i'm too awkward that i just retreat. I find myself so repulsive I refuse to talk to other, or shoot my shot or even just laugh with other people in fear i'll embarrases myself so badly. It's sad. But i guess it's up to me to change that.
About Me
Some text about me in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim..
